I am a psychologist that specializes in treating men. If you’re 18-80, I work with you. If you’ve got ADHD, trauma, addiction, relationship problems, career problems, you’re an ideal client. If you’ve served in the military, if you’re a first responder, police, firefighter, if you’re a lawyer, a doctor, a business owner, a coder, a gamer, an electrician, a carpenter, or if you drive a truck – I’m your guy.
Photo by Katerina Gordon
I’ve written about relationships before, but a few of you asked for more specific ideas and examples of how to get closer. Here are a few of my random thoughts on behaviors that I think matter a great deal in relationships.
Photo by Tom
So I’m constantly working with guys who are at some stage of change. Or at least they recognize that something needs to change. Their mood has gotten bad enough, they’re tired of their crap job, or their terrible relationship skills have served them up with an ultimatum.
The funny thing is that a lot of them don’t want to change. Can you blame them (or anybody) for not wanting change? Nope! That’s because change sucks!
Photo by Nick Page
So there's this really lame joke that therapists are always hearing. Eight or nine times out of ten when I introduce myself and tell someone that I am a psychologist, they laugh and say, “Ha, bet you have me all figured out already,” or “Ha, guess you've been analyzing me. Maybe I should come by sometime.” I laugh politely and say, "No, no.” But here’s the truth: I’m lying. Because I’m always watching people! It’s what I have carved my life into. I've made it my business to see how people behave, why that might be, if they are happy, mad, sad, or simply making a show of an emotion, playing everybody else. It’s a blessing and a curse. But I’m not the guy that’s going to call people out when I just met them and especially not in public.
Photo by Vittorio Pandolfi
Brains are amazing things, you know? They can grow, help us learn, and actually create new, never-before-seen, heard, tasted, or felt creations! They also hold our personality and our beliefs about ourselves, in relation to other people and the world. What am I? Am I good or bad? What am I good at? Am I worthwhile or worthless?
